Dear Robert,
You are what you eat. You must have eaten a sexy beast this morning. I would love to have sex with you.
In a more serious note however, I love your patience and the way you handle pressure. I love how you have a heart for sentimental things. Being soft-hearted doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re gay.
I love your ears. They’re the biggest ears in the history of biggest ears. I love you, you, Robert. If you must change, then change for the better and most importantly, for yourself.
From,
Robert xoxo
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